My parents are really cool. Other people might say their parents are cool, but they have clearly not met my parents. They are both on the far side of 50 and are cooler than I am at 20 years old, cooler than I have been at any age, and cooler than I possibly ever will be.
First things first: they own a pub. They are a landlord and a landlady. It doesn’t get much cooler than that.
Only it does. My dad is a tall man of few words. That is, unless you get him talking about music, or books, or films, and then he won’t shut up. He is one of the smartest people I know. He has a full head of hair, including a ponytail, and a great big bushy beard. No lie. My mum left home to join the police force at the age of 16. Compared to her, I’m already a good few years behind in doing something worthwhile with my life. If my dad is the geeky brains of the operation, my mum has all the savvy and the street smarts. This is not to say that she isn’t clever either, but what she excels at is dealing with people. She always knows what’s going on, what to do, and what to say. Many people, not just from our family, will turn to her in their time of need. She officially only has three kids, but really, she’s everyone’s mum. I’m sure most of my friends like her more than they like me.
I’m still not entirely clear on the story of how they met, since they both think they’re funny and crack jokes when we ask them. What I’ve gathered is that it was at some form of fancy dress party, to which my dad had decided to wear his pyjamas. My mum took one look at him and thought ‘He needs a good woman in his life.’ That entire story may be made up, but I like it, so I’ll go with it. My dad has moments of being a hopeless romantic where he tells me and my sisters that he knew from the start that my mum was ‘the one.’ My mum also has similar moments where she tells us that she still gets butterflies when she sees him. I can only hope that if I am ever with someone for 27 years and have three children with them I can still be that much in love with them.
Despite being together for so long, they only got married in 2009. They got married in the registry office and me and my sisters were the only people there. When the vicar said whatever it is they say about lawful impediments, my mum stared us down. We all laughed. It was awkward and hilarious. Afterwards we went for lunch, and my mum told our waiter that they had just got married today. He was convinced she was making some odd joke. In a way I’m quite unhappy that they got married, because it used to amuse me greatly to say that my parents were still boyfriend and girlfriend.
Overall, they are great people. I’d post a picture to visually demonstrate this, but I’m not sure they’d be all that chuffed with that.